Angel fall...

yesterday my cousin lend me this book Angel Fall it was a really sad n meaningful book...
i cried from the start of the story..
i read 10chapters already and it made me feel u have to cherish every moment with the one you love...
and even if u lost it at least u had the memory with you
all those flash backs that is the smallest thing that make u look back and ask yourself what did i do? did i make the correct move ? am i a jerk ...
and when i look at what i have now i ask myself why am i even doing this?why am i wasting my time on something that can never happen urggh what am i even thinking!
sometimes you just hope someone would understand what you are thinking know what you want can read you mind so you don't have to hide how you feel
love is just so weird when you look in that person's eyes you would feel mesmerize and its like a thousand steps pounding in your heart but when its over its like you can hear your heart breaking into pieces ..
love is like heaven but hurts like hell ...
_______________________________________________
someone once told me
that you have to choose
what you win or lose
you cant have everything
dont you take chances
you might feel the pain
dont you love in vain
cause love wont set you free
i could stand by the side
and watch this life pass me by
so unhappy but safe as could be

CHORUS
so what if it hurts me
so what if i break down
so what if this world just throws me off the edge
my feet run out of ground
i gotta find my place
i wanna hear my sound
dont care about other pain infront of me
cause im just tryna be happy, yea
just wanna be happy, yea

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i am so damn LAME =(

you know sometimes you really wanna talk to someone
but its just that u just cant think of something to talk
and the conversation just ended up with "haha...yeah...ohs....i see....hmmm...boredddd...afk..."
sighs....
it just happens to some ppl
but if u just know that person u will have so many question n the topic would not stop but its just so hard to keep the topic going on
so every time i ended up saying lame things over n over again...
this is just so lame...
i ate ice-cream today but i think its tasteless i dont even feel like eating it although i like it
its just like eating ice without any flavor...i think something is wrong with me...
i get so emotional these days...
teacher scolded me today and i felt like crying normally i would just keep quite and i wont feel anything but today i felt like crying...
something just went wrong i feel so lonely sometimes ...dont know what happen to me
sighs....

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_________________________
So a day when you've lost yourself completely
Could be a night when your life ends
Such a heart that will lead you to deceiving
All the pain held in your
Hands are shaking cold
Your hands are mine to hold

Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
Move along
(Go on, go on, go on, go on)

When everything is wrong we move along
(Go on, go on, go on, go on)
When everything is wrong, we move along
Along, along, along

When all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
[x3]

TS outting =D <3

today i went to TS with reek victor and ernie =)
we watch the movie a christmas carol it was well kinda scary n quite nice =)
then we went for bowling i strike 1time while vic strike 3 times n i dont think reek got any strikes hahaa!!!!!
the atmosphere was like so boring until jarrel turn up n the atmosphere went a lil crazier lols.
after the bowling we went to play snooker
it was fun!!! haha
we went to sushi king and eat after that and victor forgot to pay the bil and walk out
the worker thr was calling him bak n we waited for him to pay the bil lols ;)
i went like okayyy he forget to pay!!!do i know him or something lols (joking)
then we went to the arcrane dont know how to spell it!!but i think its something like this??
lols they went like playing race car n me n ernie just stand thr looking at them for like 20min we were thr and i can tell u i hear a lot of swearing from them lols =) ishh ishhh
then we took the lrt bak home it was a long walk but yup it was fun indeed =)
i had loads of fun
and i almost left my rm10 in my pocket n dump it into the washing machine thank god i remember lols

pissed

i am so damn pissed!!!
WTF i have been like going out with friends guys and girls for so long and tomorrow i wanted to go out n watch movie n sing k my mom actually say no u cannot go n sing k!!!
WTF man what century is this!!!girls have to go out with girls and cant go out with guys!!!
what the hell man!!!its not like we're gonna drink n get drunk or something
we r just gonna go n sing thats all
what is this man i am so freaking pissed off
now they r not gonna let me go out urrggh i just feel like screaming out !!!i feel so sick n tired what is this
omg man
its like my friends r bad ppl n only my cousins r good ppl n i can only go out with them urgggh!!shit

Unless u life my live , dont judge it <3

weird dreams

omg i cant believe i had this freaking weird dream
i went back to 2 years ago and everything was so different! its like instead of going back i went 2year to the future whr everything seems so Alcohol lols!!!! =D
stupid dream make me headache
i watch so u think u can dance and i just feel like dancing latin lols!!!!
its weird cause i usually dance hip hop n after watching that movie i wanna learn latin!!!
its just so nice and sexy haha ;) the way they dance it its so elegant n gorgeous!!!!
Oh mahh gawwddss i just love it!!!!


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embarrassing thing i have done on MSN ...<3

it was about 10something n i on my msn
i saw someone on my friend list listening to the jason derulo-whatcha say song
so i quickly start a conver with him
eventually i tot he was my friend zhong yao
but whn i saw his display pic it was someone i dont even know!!!
i just felt like OMG crystal i cant believe u actually ask a stranger to send u that song!!!
it was so embarrassing ...but he was kind enough to send me the song =)
such a embarrassing day sighs >0<
ishh ishhh!!!!


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___________________
this was the song lyrics n the song i wanted so badly lols!!!
[Verse 1]
I was so wrong for so long
Only tryna please myself (myself)
Girl, I was caught up in her lust
When I don't really want no one else
So, no I know I should've treated you better
But me and you were meant to last forever

[Hook]
So let me in (let me in) give me another chance (another chance)
To really be your man
Cause when the roof caved in and the truth came out
I just didn't know what to do
But when I become a star we'll be living so large
I'll do anything for you (for you)
So tell me girl

[Chorus]
Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmm that you only meant well?
Well of course you did
Mmmm whatcha say, (whatcha say)
Mmmm that it's all for the best?
Of course it is
Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmm that you only meant well?
Well of course you did
Mmmm whatcha say, (whatcha say)
Wha- wha- wha- wha- what did she say

starting of something new <3

14.11.2009 (it was a cold night)
i think about this problem for the long time..
is there something between us that went wrong...
even if we try to be together everything just seem so wrong and different...
i finally had the courage to speak out , i figure that 1 of us has to speak out not now but still sooner why not i be the bad guy and bring up this topic.
we all agree that the feel between us is not as strong as last time and the gap between the both of us is further n further ...
i ask if he wants to go on with this...he say he don't know...
it was hard to make a decision but it's even harder to lie to urself telling urself that its ok u like him n tomorrow will be a better day but it cant change we cant go back to the past and its the fact...
finally i made the decision i told him maybe we could be BFF =) that was the best choice to not destroy our relationship ...
i asked him to move on and not hang on its worthless trying to cry over something that is already gone
i didnt mean to hurt u but it was the choice i made and we can still hang out :)
________________
According to you
I'm stupid, I'm useless, I can't do anything right.
According to you
I'm difficult, hard to please, forever changing my mind.
I'm a mess in a dress, can't show up on time, even if it would save my life.
According to you. According to you.

But according to him
I'm beautiful, incredible, he can't get me out of his head.
According to him
I'm funny, irresistible, everything he ever wanted.
Everything is opposite,
I don't feel like stopping it,
so baby tell me what I got to lose.
He's into me for everything I'm not, according to you.

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