Monday, February 15, 2010

14feb2010 Valentines Day and Chinese New Year

I set the alarm 8 o clock sharp
when it rang in the morning i woke up switch it off and went back to sleep i didn't know why usually i would be like jumping up and down running to the bathroom bath and wake everyone up and get ready to go out... i guess i was too tired i woke up bath got ready and i went to my grandpa's house everyone was thr whn we got thr
it was really crowded everyone is like in the CNY mood all RED =) even some of my cousins uncles dye their hair RED!!!!haha well i wore red shirt red shoes too!!!!
then i pray first then collect all my ANG POWS WEEEE ;) then it was totally boring!!!no one thr plays card seriously haha but me n my cousins bout the same age we went and CAMWHORE!!!! we did funny pose take lots of pics and we had a gay old time but well some of our relatives went like staring at us like WEIRD!!!!these kids are WEIRD haha but who cares we don't lols
then it was time to leave i went back to my home to get ANG POW and greet the other relatives when i got home MIRACLE!!!!everyone was still thr like waiting for me to come home haha lols
i invited reek and victor to my house to get ang pows then we play cards
then for like 1 hour we went out to pav it is Valentines day so i wanted to like watch Valentines Day with him to celebrate but then when we went to pav cinema OMFG!!!it was flooded with ppl and i just went like please god please let us have a seat but unfortunately all full all sold out we just went like urrrgggghhh!!!!! we walk back to TS to watch movie and its still the same all sold out we were damn sad then we went to eat and we jalan jalan well both of the guys went to arcade i just stand thr like a weirdo freak next time i am gonna join them too lols i don't want to stand thr and do ntg lols!!!!
then we went home by taxi =)
i was sleeping on his shoulder with his hands wrap around me i just love the way that feels
then we went to my place to watch movie we watch THE COVENANT i actually watched that movie for like 2 times but i still watch lar then we took pictures and it was seriouly 110%better than go out just sitting in my room watching movie is the best i hug him and we take pictures
i wish time stopped thr and i hoped it last forever thinking about it now makes my heart pound like crazy and my face turn red like a tomato...
but sometimes i seriously don't know how to say what i feel but i know its real...i am being myself but its just the other side no one ever knew (well except for my 2BFF's well they know how wild i can go lols)
it was the happiest Valentines day ever seriously i wish time stopped and i wish he never go back so early i wish i can be with him forever i wish i can hug him for hours and lastly i wish he will never get bored of me and leave me...
i really love him so much i don't know how to say it but sometimes i am just so shy i couldn't say things out loud but i really know what i am doing and what the hell i am thinking i know but when i want to say it out it just doesn't come out it just got stuck at my throat and its like MUTE...
its like someone click the MUTE button i know what to say but the voice is just not coming out...
and i know that sometimes it hurts so much...i get how you feel cause i feel the same way too sometimes i just feel like closing the door and crying out loud i feel like drinking and make myself dizzy and say out what i feel...but i just can't...
i really love you so much and it hurts so much when your upset i know you say its ok but deep down i know how you feel i know you are waiting for me to say it but i just didn't say it out loud its just pure disappointment and that is the time when you feel like the world is upside down and what you want isn't coming out well and you feel like biting someones head off like a gummy bear...
i am sorry but i love you baby <3 no matter what happen i will love you now , always and forever i just hope that i can call you in my dreams and tell you everything i know bout that day i miss you so much babe and from now on i set my mind i am gonna be brave and i am gonna try and tell you how i feel and everything i am not gonna change being my old self i am just gonna be better than before :)
and i really love you alot can you hear me if you see this can you feel how i feel every single word i type its not just for the god sake of fun its real every single feeling in this page its all how i feel and things i never get to speak out and say ...being with you is never bored being with you its like a roller-coaster ride being with you it is 100% unpredictable and being with you is the happiest momment in my life being with you is when i feel like i am myself and i don't have to hide

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